Should you drink on your first date?

 You tell us what you want to do! Do you feel like drinking on your first date to loosen up and keep it real? If you really feel like drinking is right at the moment where maybe you are ordering a nice meal and want a wine to go with it? You should definitely do that. One drink is good, two drinks are okay and three drinks might just pass the wrong message. Do everything with your heart in it however don’t overdo it since it’s just your first date. 

If someone judges you for drinking, well you have your answer! If you’re a man and you’re drinking, one advice is you should certainly offer the woman you’re with a drink too. It’s totally okay for you to order the first drink if you’re a woman - by the way. No one should judge or be judged for drinking on the first date. 

Moreover, it’s also crucial to remember that you want to ensure the other person is comfortable with you drinking. It’s a good idea to ask - “Is it okay if I order a drink?” before you go on and order one. Giving the person you’re with a heads up helps to boost their comfort level with you. 

If your first date is a sip-and-paint date where you are sipping some wine while enjoying a painting session, it’s a given that you will be drinking a little bit. However, if you don’t want to drink in such a situation too, please let the person you’re with know that you don’t enjoy drinking and prefer something nonalcoholic. It’s totally okay to get something without alcohol too. 

There’s no definite answer for what one should and shouldn’t do on a first date. It very much depends on what you feel like doing and what feels right to you. You might just go with your gut feeling and instinct without worrying about it too much. If the date goes well and if it’s meant to work out, it will. There’s no point in stressing over the minute details. The beauty of a first date lies in what you observe about the other person rather than what you plan to show about yourself. The best advice is to simply be yourself. The right match will come by. 

Whether you want to drink on your first date or not - don’t stress it, just do what you feel like doing. However, don’t drink too much either. A drink or two is okay. Do keep in mind your capacity and drink accordingly. You don’t want to put the other person off. 

Why understanding the Chinese Yin Yang philosophy will benefit you in any relationship?

The Chinese philosophy of Yin Yang and the underlying Taoist philosophy has been preached by many love experts across the world. This philosophy has also been propagated by people who have been happily married for over 50 years! Surely, there is something special about this philosophy that has ensured people are speaking about it for so many years!

According to the Yin Yang philosophy, there is a masculine and feminine side to everyone. And this depiction is made with one side being black and the other being white. The philosophy states that no two individuals are the same. To live together, it’s important to appreciate the differences that are very much a figment of reality. Most couples tend to focus on similarities at the start of a relationship and bond over that. However, this is not particularly healthy. It is crucial to focus on the differences and find harmony with their existence. It is common for partners to have different hobbies, interests, goals, career expectations, life expectations, and opinions. It is important to appreciate these differences rather than expecting common interests throughout.

Moreover, when partners have diverse hobbies, both partners have different viewpoints to bring to the table. This results in a more powerful relationship with a greater perspective rather than a narrow relationship with the same perspective being echoed. Moreover, couples that have lived together for too long often feel like space is lacking between the partners. They tend to feel suffocated by spending too much time together. Spending time on different hobbies and cultivating those hobbies individually can lead to the creation of space within a relationship. Moreover, each partner also feels a greater sense of ownership over their own time and does not feel restricted to their social circle being only around their partner.

When both partners appreciate the differences between each other, there is also greater harmony between the partners rather than arguments to find common ground. While there is nothing bad about arguing in a healthy manner and having a discussion about a topic, often it leads to resentment over the argument and breeds more arguments. Sometimes, the argument can also involve a condescending tone which is detrimental to the relationship in the long term. The Chinese philosophy of Yin Yang appreciates the harmony that needs to be created for a long-term relationship.

Being happily married is not a myth. It’s a reality that comes with hard work and constant work on our own values and philosophy. For there to be a happy relationship with greater harmony and peace, the Yin Yang philosophy must be embodied in some form or another in the relationship. If you start following it, your relationship will be better in the long term!